The Affirmation of Dreams as Reality

Our dreams are the signposts to our inner reality. If we remain in touch with these extra-ordinary nightly events, we become closer to our truth. We will know our path, find our way.
As the monsoon rains become heavier in India, my state of mind goes deeper within. In the last ten days, I have become quiet, not wanting to work in any way, other than what is essential each day. There are long periods when I just sit; there are few thoughts, no activities.
Sometimes I lie down in yoga poses, supported by a pillow, the external support somehow allowing me to go deeper within to my own being. From this deep restfulness, I know that soon something will come up; it is in the air and the rains, the knowledge that there will be a new breakthrough in my healing.
My plans were to go to Australia next May for three months and offer workshops for women who have suffered sexual abuse, but my dream reveals something that makes me question this decision.
‘Last night in my dream, I am in a church, planning in the next few days to teach and talk about my book, healing and women’s issues. I am in an office making photocopies for the course.
Suddenly the office is full of women, and one woman asks me about the background to my book, to the healing and the courses. All the women look at me waiting for an answer.
As I speak, tears start running down my face, then I am crying fully, then loud sobs fill my whole being, tears of devastation of what happened to me as a child, the suffering, the pain… then the dream ends. My whole being is crying.’

I wake then in the light of day, the early morning rain patters on the roof. I awaken with the knowledge that I am not ready for this work; I have nothing to offer anyone until my healing is complete. How can I help others if there are all these tears still inside me?
I make coffee and sit. Grief is there, grief that it has taken so many years to heal from childhood sexual abuse – already it is almost six years. Then there is the sadness of the lost opportunity that I am simply not ready to hold workshops in this way. I have nothing to offer other women.
After the grief there is relief, knowing that I have no longer to struggle to do this work. There is the awareness that everything happens in its own time and place. I am reminded again of the importance of the inner life and dreams, prompting us to awareness that our outer realities simply are not there in quite this direct way.

Dreams can become our guiding principle.

Carolyn Shanti.